Frustrated Navigator Gifts

Road signs.

'Why can't you admit you're lost?'

The Lost World: You are Here

"I am not asking for directions."

"Look on the GPS to see if there's any wormholes through time and space."

Develop Your Social Skills: Asking Questions is a Great Way to Keep a Conversation Going.

Of course, Hal rented a car with economy gps.

Fire Backwards.

"Whisky? Have you got anything stronger?"

Support Group for the Directionally Challenged.

'I'm tired of all the small talk.'

"I told you it was too soon to give him The Talk."

Scarecrow Directions

'Wilcox! Do come in...I'm just leaving!'

"We must be in the wrong wing."

'How did this happen to me - a gondolier?'

G.P.S. satellites gone bad

Ryanair refunds

But enough about me, let's talk about my job.

'Vocabulary doesn't seem that hard 'til you start trying to use it on girls.'

"The kids got candy and all I got were disturbed looks."

"If I hear one more buzz I will pull this car over!"

"Oh, great—here comes that crazy #@!*%! Jeff who won't shut up about conspiracy theories. How's my hair look?"

Intelligent Navigation Device...

"This passport is so weak that I need a visa to enter my own country."

Wordplay: Self-seeking.

Excess Baggage: Most taxi drivers have GPS in their cars, but will still get completely lost when you are the passage.

Worry about everything that might happen/Me/Be ready for nothing that does happen.

"Your call is important to us, please hold on for the next available echo."

'Sailing, it's a sport that doesn't float my boat.'

Washington D.C. next right, or is it left?

You are here.

Meet Santa. I've been working for weeks on the list of presents I want. I've got my Christmas present list and an invitation for Santa to attend my birthday party next year -- I know it's a long shot but I figured it couldn’t hurt to try. He just wants to know if you've been naughty or nice ... You didn't have to bring your whole resume. "Naughty or nice"? Does he mean your private life or your public persona? Yeah, it's all so confusing! Is sharing music files naughty or nice?

"It's been a wonderful evening, Fred -- Please don't spoil it by making me squirt you with pepper spray."

"I'm sorry, that didn't come out right."