Frustrated Flyer Gifts

"If I hear one more buzz I will pull this car over!"

"Just give me a moment..."

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

'I love the mountains and all, but I simply can't do this....I'm just too chicken.'

Felix suddenly remembers what the string on his finger is a reminder of.

Paper being carefully folded until it resembles a scrunched up paper ball.

"Ideally we're keen to go somewhere that they're not trying to kill us."

'Relax, folks, he just did that for me. When I get the hiccups, a little scare never fails to cure them.'

A man jumps out of a window to avoid an injection.

Ryanair refunds

'I always ask for a seat in the tail. You never hear of a plane backing into a mountain...'

Heathrow Protesters - This airport's rubbish!

"Miss, I'm familiar with the 'Fasten Seatbelt' sign, but what's with the 'Check Engine' light?"

"The possibilities are endless!" "The possibilities ended."

"Bad news. Our luggage went to the same place my old job did."

Bob landed in Hell. And to make matters worse, they lost his luggage.

Road signs.

"Sometimes, I wish we'd never invented football."

"This passport is so weak that I need a visa to enter my own country."

Sorry, this game is not available in your area

'Test Pilot.'

Intelligent Navigation Device...

Airplane Catches Woman's Washing.

"Our maintenance crew is fixing a problem that should only take a few minutes but which will haunt you for the duration of the flight."

"We get your point about legroom, now please put them back in the cabin"

'We need a third runway for all the ministers flying to India and China to tell them to cut their carbon emissions.'

'I am so very frustrated! It's hard for you to understand, but you don't know the golf course.'

Advanced Origami

'There's no way you'll ever get me up in one of those contraptions!'

'I hate flying. Thank God for terra firma ... or terra mushy ...'

'You want a shuffle flight to Buffalo?'

"Your call is important to us, please hold on for the next available echo."

"... and there's a nominal fee for that emotional baggage."

'Oh no! I forgot my driving glasses! What! You too? Now what are we going to do?'

'When the computer senses that you are in a hurry, it automatically slows down.'