Frugal Wanderer Gifts

Airport Security. It takes longer getting through security, but by wearing all my clothes, I don't have to pay to check a bag!

My 5-year-old nephew cut his hair! His mom was so upset until she thought: 'Wait a minute! I just saved 12 bucks!'

Clancy Strip: Money and Beer

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

Cheapskate Cruises

"It was rated on all the travel websites. 'Best economy tour'."

"Could I have a bottle of the Chateau Lafitte '67 but filled with the wine from Tesco 2019."

'Phone for help? Are you mad? Have you any idea how much it costs to use a mobile abroad?'

"I can't believe I'm paying $5,000 a month for you to stream Intro to Psychology when I get all of TV for $15.99."

"It's only until the gas prices go down and I can afford to drive the car again. Maybe you should have an ambulance follow me."

"To keep warm in winter you're looking at a new central heating system costing £20,000."

Take pity on me. I can't give much this year. What is this heresy, son? I didn't get a raise this year, got furloughed this summer, am behind on my cable bill, can't afford proper dates. But it's the holidays. Think of the needy. Pierre in flat-panels has a new baby. Sandy, the mobile device manager, toils so hard for your business. And don't forget Apple. It's got to make its quarter. Computer Villa. Customer service. I shouldn't just think of myself. That's better. I'd like to upgrade all my d

"Now THAT's what I call a budget airline!"

Welcome all to the monthly gathering of Tightwads United. Hi there. Hello. Hey. On tonight's agenda: Dumpster diving, coupon clipping, and a special lecture. How to carpool while always getting the other person to drive. I'm like a god. Woohoo!! Yeah!!! Clap clap clap clap clap clap clap. Tightwads United.

"Once again, how little did you pay for this room?"

Everything for a buck.

"Why pay for a tree in November when you can get one off the side of the road in January for free?"

"I always say; 'You don't need to spend a lot of money to have a good time on a first date."

"Sure, you can buy them another round, but is this really how you want to spend your MacArthur Grant?"

'Gentlemen, it's time we tightened our belts.'

"I know we have to cut costs, but is bringing only one of each a good idea?"

'With the price of petrol, I had to take on a second job to pay for the petrol to drive to my first job!'

'I could only afford a Yo.'

How to do without

'Two can't live as cheaply as one, but we will get double - occupancy rates when we travel'

"Why can't you just buy some modern LED lights?"

"Do you have this in an $11.99?"

'Most of the dental floss gets thrown out on used. No wonder I'm always broke.'

"There's no getting away from the numbers....only by forgetting holidays, giving up drink, the cinema, meals out and socialising...will we be able to afford any quality of life when we retire."

"He's given up trying to find anything else he can cut to reach 40% savings."

"I know one secret! Not spending $30 on a book filled with common sense!"

"Fuel poverty is not the same as being too mean to switch the heating on...."

'I wish you'd put the heater back on Frank! Even the wall ducks have gone somewhere warmer!'

"This is your great, great uncle Orlando. He was a great mathematician, but a little cheap. He always picked up the check at restaurants...but only to make sure the math was right."