Budget Wanderer Gifts

"Your ticket was $340, but the flight is extra."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

'Do you think we should tell anyone about this?'

'The government's right. Not counting, food, clothing, energy, shelter, health care, or transportation, inflation is hardly going up.'

'We're asking what america can do without to reduce the deficit...no, ma'ma! the Gop and Dems are not options!'

"I want you to know that emotion overrode reason."

'Honestly Bob, it's not that bad. If you can make as much next year as you did this year you'll be able to pay off your outstanding taxes for last year. That'll just leave the interest, the tax for this year and... my fees.'

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

"I'm on a tight budget. Make it look like I cut at myself."

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

Depressed Businessman at Office Christmas Party.

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

'He must be going economy!'

'One thing about being in the drivers seat -- you pay for the gas.'

GAS. If you have to ask, you probably can't afford it.

An airplane with a sardine can opener instead of a door

'Can I ask you what you've had to eat this morning, Sir? . . .Have you evacuated your bowels since then? . . . I'm afraid I'll have to charge you for the additional weight.'

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

'And, at those prices, we have two wheel well seats available.'

"It was rated on all the travel websites. 'Best economy tour'."

"I know we said we would get you a laptop.. but this will have to do until business gets better."

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

"Now THAT's what I call a budget airline!"

"This is the last time I let you handle our vacation plans, you cheapskate."

"So I misplaced a couple hundred Bitcoin. Maybe the dog ate the wallet. I din't know. S**t happens!"

Expensive greeting cards.

'Any other husband would hire two pairs of skis.'

"Yow! Thank goodness you've kept costs on a short leash!"

"Once again, how little did you pay for this room?"

Due to recent cutbacks, several major airlines have eliminated their snack carts.