Frugal Firecracker Gifts

'That's my savings for a rainy day. Actually, it's more like for a sun shower.'

"Send ME to bed early, will they?"

Unable to afford scaffolding, Dave ties plungers on his feet to get up a wall.

'The scariest story I know is escalating health care costs.'

"Really! A firecracker! Test his nerves! Where do you come up with these stupid ideas?"

"Is that neat whisky?"

Home Business - Printer Ink.

"They've worked out the can save money by sharing toilet reading material."

"Don't you love the smell of burning leather boots this time of year?"

Safety first - be aware of what is around you.

"Now just open wide and relax. Uncle Fred has told me he has a way to fix your braces faster and cheaper than that overpriced orthodontist."

'I may be 40 years old, but I have the student debt of a 20 year old.'

"Dude, we are not setting the neighbor's house on fire this year!"

'Stop complaining. We can't afford a car with airbags.'

"You created fire, and this is how you use it?"

Airport Security. It takes longer getting through security, but by wearing all my clothes, I don't have to pay to check a bag!

'I'll only have one pack of nicotene patches this week. My mate's supposed to be getting me some cheaper ones from abroad.'

Spring Painter

You're getting cheaper, Armstrong. I'm getting more efficient. It's the American way. Businesses have to keep growing profits to satisfy their investors. The innovative entrepreneur finds ways to grow sales while constantly cutting costs. By giving customers used straws. They're broken in.

Eliminating gas spending.

Safety first - do not store certain items together.

'It was hard enough making ends meet when it was just the two of us. Now we have a baby and suddenly there's four more stomachs to feed.'

Man patching up his bag.

Austerity Christmas Crackers.

"Thank you, but a latte costs 5 bucks."

Sparklers

"What the hell was that? I was expecting fireworks."

fuel price hike

"Warning: Read page six before igniting the 'Hose-Head' firecracker."

'What's this, your estimate or your telephone number?'

Man with cut off jeans next to 50% off sign

"Now calm down...there's no need to overreact."

'Hear that? This calls for a major readjustment of your bank account.'

'... So what does a half a tree cost?'

Christams gift ideas - January sales catalogues.