Frugal Aficionado Gifts

"Murder, eh? They nabbed me for bargain-hunting without a license."

'If there's no discretion, then it's not discretionary spending.'

'What do you do with the time you save?'

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

My 5-year-old nephew cut his hair! His mom was so upset until she thought: 'Wait a minute! I just saved 12 bucks!'

Clancy Strip: Money and Beer

"It's made from all our old leftovers. I call it 'Rescue Casserole.'"

'Dave will only turn the heating on when he thinks it's absolutely necessary.'

'The sick economy isn't why J.B.has cut back on spending. He always was a tightwad.'

'Withdrawal symptoms.'

"Years of penny-pinching really paid off. The price of copper just went up again."

"He can afford a bigger cage. His old tax forms line the bottom."

"That's too big a pill for me to swallow, Harold!"

Pandora's box.

"I always say; 'You don't need to spend a lot of money to have a good time on a first date."

"Why pay for a tree in November when you can get one off the side of the road in January for free?"

"He's given up trying to find anything else he can cut to reach 40% savings."

How to save on your heating bill...

"Why can't you just buy some modern LED lights?"

"Do you have this in an $11.99?"

'You must know my kids...they spend like there's no tomorrow.'

"Do you have a dollar menu?"

"There's no getting away from the numbers....only by forgetting holidays, giving up drink, the cinema, meals out and socialising...will we be able to afford any quality of life when we retire."

'Yes, Bob, Allan's wife did let him buy tickets to the big game, but then Allan didn't spend all his allowance on nachos and beer, now, did he?'

How to do without

'Generally, cost-cutting is a good thing. Specifically, too much of a good thing.'

Today, it's chic to be cheap.

"Armstrong, you're the cheapest cheapskate on earth." "Not yet, but a man can dream." "This toothache is killing me but I have no money and no insurance. Do you know where I can find a really cheap dentist?" "Of course. I can give you my guy's name. He works for peanuts." "I’ll get a pen." "You’ll also need a passport and lots of penicillin."

"I wanted to give Christmas bonuses but that would violate the separation of church and business."

"He was right about saving that box. It did come in handy."