Friendship With A Twist Gifts

"I love spending quality time with you, Ed. The fact it's billable is just the icing on the cake."

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

Skeleton playing fetch.

"...until death do you a favor."

Online Dating

Emotional Bling

Cinderella and Charming the Clown

"Florets! How lovely, I'd better put them in some boiling water."

"He was a grouch when I met him. It was love at first gripe."

Frank, this is carrying safe sex too far.

She never could tell when he was being sarcastic.

"I never actually said I was spiderman...I just said that no one has ever seen us in the same room together."

"Now will you do something funny."

'I got you 10 roses. I believe strong relationships are based on the metric system.'

Happy Valentine's Day

"It's my box of secrets. It has things I've thought about but would never tell anyone!"

"I didn't want you doing what you did on our last date."

The Clown Hit

"Mr. Sherman, you hired our team of management consultants to stremline your enterprise, and that is precisely what we are doing."

'Group hug anyone?'

Nothing like a Valentine from my boyfriend David... the cardiologist.

"Date night again already?"

"You're doing great boy! Just don't bark."

'Do you have one that plays the theme from Godzilla?'

'Do you , Cynthia, who is completely free of any genetic engineering, take Rodney, who is equally free...'

"Like THAT's ever going to work!"

'Single Heating and Cooling technician in search of intelligent, attractive woman. Send picture of your furnace & AC.'

'I like a man in a suit.'

'I had a great time tonight. I'd like to see you again in about six months.'

"I'm just going to step into the bank to get some money for dinner."

"I do - but it might just be the liquor talking."

"The disciples are gonna be totally freaked."

Valentines for Things

Heart vending machine.