Friends Of The Bride Gifts

"Nobody told me it was a dress down wedding day!"

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

'It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.'

'...In functionality and in dysfunctionality....'

'...till death, or a really huge argument over ringtones, do you part.'

Speech

"Take your time. Do you see the person who made you wear that dress?"

"Yes ... no!"

Bouncing baby

"Now, to continue our argument before we were interrupted..."

Toy 4x4: Now with real emissions!

"Unaccustomed as I am to public squeaking…"

"Can the bride refrain from twitching her entire left side?"

"This is all so ARBITRARY!"

"My favourite part of the wedding ceremony was when the minister said "repeat after me"..."

"Remember when we used to wonder whether to kiss on the first date?"

"Bride or Groom?"

'I've always been partial to the Goo Goo Dolls.'

'The prince and the princess lived happily ever after on their profits from capital-appreciation funds.'

"I guess I just always imagined I'd be givin' you the perfect shotgun wedding."

'I'll be glad to discuss Pal's itchy skin in my office tomorrow morning, Mrs. Allan!'

"And do you promise to love, honour, and give me all your personal information that I can pass on to third parties..."

The Happiest Hen in Abingdon.

Apparently I didn't learn enough. They say I have to come back tomorrow. Welcome to Kindergarten.

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'

"I have an objection to this marriage! You're supposed to pay my fee upfront!"

Caution: Bridal Crossing.

'As long as it's got six fingers and eighteen toes...'

Little Dorrit - The Third Volume of the Registers

It's been hard to find silver linings in this situation but I was able to buy this boat when my daughter had to switch from a huge to a tiny wedding.

'The Fourth of July would be a lot more fun if school weren't out anyway.'

'Don's always been a model husband. Unfortunately, not a working model.'

"Look, Wendy....our pets are playing together!"

'Now that you're hitched how about selling me your golf clubs,Sid?'

'It's two hours until the reception. I can easily get in nine holes.'