Friday Humor Gifts

"Damn! Just as my inertia was starting to build up momentum."

'I hear we're beginning to cut back to half weeks.'

I rest my case, your honor, in celebration of "Casual Defense Friday." ! !

So busy...

'Was the interview too early for you?'

You realize, Harris, if you LIVED here, you'd be home by now.

Desk trays - 'in', 'out', and 'one of these days'.

"Oh my gosh, honey! Look out!"

"I wanted a Meticulous Monday or a Thorough Thursday report. This reads more like a Frivolous Friday."

Zoo. It's wednesday again --- time to wash the camels. I hate "hump" day. (Published originally on July 20, 2005).

"And that, gentlemen, is the Friday 4.55 pm Bad News Email Dump."

"As you can see, I've learned the alphabet."

'I should have told you, every Friday senior partners get to do the Prosecco Polonaise.'

Merry Sisyphus - Christmas pudding being pushed up a mountain.

"Yes, I know that chocolate comes from the cocoa Bean...but that does NOT count as a vegetable!"

"105% of the staff who completed 84% of the process were 95% sure that it was a 100% waste of time."

"Brad, if you can't say 'I love you' without using finger quotes, I'm outta here."

Be careful how you unwrap it I think it MIGHT be his stool sample!

"I've never been so humiliated in my entire week."

"Somewhere along the line the world got a whole lot dorkier."

Demon in the elevator. Man says: 'Sorry, are you going up or down?'

"We love Santa, but Santa didn't know as much about investing as he thought he did."

"Perhaps we should rethink 'Don't Come To Work Fridays.'"

'Monday is too far from Friday, yet Friday is too close to Monday.'

'This is the only time I really get to seize the day.'

Typical Monday

"This isn't exactly what I mean by 'casual Fridays'."

"I'm afraid it's another case of 'chestnuts roasting too near an open fire' doctor."

'I've asked Santa for a tank of unleaded petrol.'

The Navigator on Christmas Eve

"Reindeer?! It's beginning to smell a lot like Christmas."

'Well, I'm home for the weekend - shall we have the row now or later?'

"Yeh the reports nearly done, I'm beginning to see light at the end of the tunnel."

Giant cat sleeps on a building

"I love bonfires. Thanks to all the junk mail I get, I have one everyday."