Freezer Management Gifts

"Got a deer."

How to Deal With Leftover Turkey

Never tell the boss "You can count on me" during inventory.

Snow is falling...

Alaskan Cryogenic Society.

Mankind's earliest ancestor emerges from the primordial ooze, closely followed by a prehistoric species of re-sealable plastic containers.

"If you liked tonight's meal, you might enjoy 'Making The Meal,' a documentary with outtakes and commentary when the cook ran out of eggs because someone put an empty carton back in the refrigerator..."

'I tell ya Frank, if we find one of these babies big enough, we could live forever!'

Gas Price Reads: Way Too Much.

"And unlimited freezer space, naturally..."

'Dang! The water's expired.' (Spring Water).

'What luck!'

'That's what I hate about Rental Boats.'

'Mister Nooka, taking over the frozen food division.'

'Freezer is on the blink.'

'Daddy, this is Eddie. Eddie's conducting a study on middle class eating habits.'

"There's only two things that really fascinate men. One is fire and the other one isn't."

'What's wrong, dear? You haven't magnetized anything to the refrigerator in days.'

Self-Storage

'There was a power failure today - we're having steak, fish, chicken, hamburger, turkey, and pork chops for dinner.'

Chef with a checklist.

Mom's Home-Deforested Cooking!

Health and safety at work.

'We don't have energy-efficient appliances but the food in the 'fridge has gone green.'

'A salesman dropped by today. Boy, was he a fast talker.'

'Why couldn't there be global FREEZING?'

'It says here we don't have to report minor injuries.'

'I'm not worried about terrorists, I'm cleaning out the fridge.'

"All the money we've saved on bulk food we've spent on freezers!"

"I've learnt to preserve food through salting or smoking to break the 'Feast or Famine' cycle. . ."

'I'm a self-starter unfortunately I'm also a self-finisher.'

'Oh no, freezer's on the blink again!'

"Uh-oh, I think I hear a lawsuit."

Petrol 10 kms ahead

"Behind one of these doors is a ferocious tiger. Behind the other is a beautiful lady. There might also be a tiger there, too. I buy so many tigers it's basically become a storage issue at this point."