Freezer Feng Shui Wizard Gifts

Anatomy of a freezer drawer

"Behold! As I transform this family size frozen lasagna into a meal for one."

'You've got, like, a Feng Shui problem with your pancreas, dude.'

'Oh, just chuck it in a corner somewhere...'

...My feng shui would be incompatible with your sumo wrestling.

Japanese woman in minimalist house reads 'How to Clutter Your Life'

'Davinia! Your Feng Shui person's here.'

"Well, your feng shui isn't my feng shui."

"Jonathan! I've told you not to put your space toys in the freezer and pretend they're on the ice planet!"

'Please forgive me for anything I've said or left unsaid.'

'For our next party, let's invite a carpenter, a painter and an upholsterer so they can help us clean up afterward.'

'He keeps grounding out the energy flow.'

'It may not be your feng shui, but it's my feng shui.'

"Don't these fools realize they're violating every principle of feng-shui?"

Snow is falling...

'Well Miss Hayward, your suggestion of trying Feng Shui didn't work.'

A few post-Christmas options for Santa.

Visual Gag: Dracula reading a Fang Shui book. The Vampires version of 'Feng' Shui

"Love your feng shui!"

What your house plant says about you...

"That Feng Shui class I took is paying off!"

Back in a snap (chiropractor).

"It's just me, the algae-eater. Mind if I tidy up a bit in here?"

Frat House Feng Shui

'I want you to sit up front right by my desk. It's not because I want to keep an eye on you. It's a feng shui thing.'

The Feng Shui of the road must be off.

'Eddie, you've tried aggressive growth, multicaps, small caps, blue chips...now maybe it's time to try a support group for underperforming portfolios?'

'A surgeon operated on the wrong side of the operating room, and is being charged with medical feng shui malpractice.'

'We want to adopt a kid. Do you have a choice our feng shui consultant can look at?'

"For Feng Shui I'd like to move your liver above your lungs.''

"And unlimited freezer space, naturally..."

Feng Sushi

'To maximize student achievement, the Feng Shui consultant advises one student per classroom.'

'I moved the computer and phone off my desk. You wouldn't understand. It's a Feng Shui thing and it has successfully reduced my job related stress.'

"Good afternoon. Feng-shui consultation bureau."