Freeloading Philosopher Pillows

'I'm not a freeloader, cousin Henry. I'm a member of Boarders without Borders.'

"They're born into captivity, it's all they know."

'It's not what you think. It's not about our liberation.'

'Well, you're bankrupt, but look on the bright side -- it only cost you eight dollars per transaction!'

'I'm feeling a little remiss about missing both free throws.'

"It sounds like taking over as their leader would actually be extremely ineffective."

"I want to tell her I love her and let her know I'm careful with money."

"I used to complain about being trapped in a cage, until he got his 250 premium channels."

"I told the carol singers where to go in no uncertain terms, so that's saved us some money!"

"Sure, I had a retirement plan. Stop going to work"

Presidential Medal of Freedom

When they said more people were choosing to holiday at home I think they meant in the UK

'I'm not paying $200 per hour for therapy, so you must be the one who's nuts.'

Evolution of Chair

Freedom

It's the dinner I didn't make. It's kind of a Zen Thing

The American experiment.

Very sad piggy bank

"Diversification doesn't mean hiding the money under the mattress, the sofa and 2 chairs!"

"What's the secret of your longevity, Grampa?" "I guess it's because I was just never that curious about anything."

"The long wait for greatness to be thrust upon one."

"I don't believe you're a minimalist I think you're just mean."

"Why would I want an ocean-going yacht when I've got a rocking chair in my front porch?"

"Why are you typing your own letters?"

"I used to live each dray to the fullest. Now I'm satisfied with every other Tuesday."

'Uncle, we need to up our prices, sand is getting scarce.'

"I resent having to pay for my parents 'baby boomer' pensions, pensions that I'll never be able to afford."

"I tried being my own boss, but my wife got jealous."

"How come we never go out anymore and spend money we don't have?"

'One is for me, and one is for my 401 (k).'

'Think he'll ever spring for a bowl?'

'Sure, I've profited from my mistakes, but it was all eaten up by taxes!'