Freedom Day Gifts

Freedom Day: Please Rave Responsibly

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

Circa 1928, The Reese's Candy laboratory.

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

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"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

Carefree luggage.

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

On August 14, 2011 at app. 2:00 p, Derek Winslow made scientific history by converting an item of the animal kingdom into an item of the plant kingdom.

'As you can see by the pie chart, most of our expenses go to well, pie.'

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

Smart Ass - Wise Ass

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

"They're wearing cameras. How humiliating."

Clown on bike.

Clyde thought “Atomic Sparklers” was just an ad gimmick

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

Here and There Trays

'Actually, accounting is an exact science.'

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

Children disturbing a heart rate reading.

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

A man peddles U.S. flags on the sidewalk, next to a man peddling copies of the U.S. constitution

'I'm sorry, but everyone is in a meeting.'

"Pssst! Do you have anything on American history?"

'You're going to have to make some changes in your lifestyle.'

Assault 'n' Vinegar

Fast food. Even faster food

"I told you playing Pin the Tail on the Donkey was a dumb idea."

'Your shoe's untied.'

"Please ask your pet to kindly put down the weapon."

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