Fraud Examiners Gifts

'Around here we don't play 'good cop-bad cop'. We play 'good bank - bad bank!''

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

'You'll like this, gang ? it's an 'eyes-only' list of 'shady-but-tolerated' loopholes allowed by the Securities and Exchange Commission.'

Ducks and hares taken in by a wolf at a seance

Is this your idea of a joke, Findlay...?

'To hear our privacy policy, please tell us you credit card and social security numbers...'

Lion Tamers School - Lion licking his lips examiner marking a fail

'I can't believe an Alligator stole my identity... I mean, it's quite obvious I'm a Crocodile!'

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

'Thank you for not guessing.'

Examiners.

'That's part of the reason for our problem. We lost the key to the door.'

"It's my conscience... It's all achy"

'Well you checked my £20 note so I'm checking the change you gave me!'

"Office of quality assurance"

'He's a real stickler for punctuality. He got really annoyed when I was late for an appointment, next week.'

"Bob, you've been warned before. You can't come to prayer just to gather gossip material."

"I pride myself on being able to walk that fine line between misdemeanor and felony."

"Here's my wallet, my phone, the key to the safe and an application form for your so-called 'mind control device.'"

Fake Counterfeit Money

"You have been specially selected to upload your bank details. Offer ends midnight."

"Smart Arse"

Barrister asking a witness to produce burnt papers

Lambs to the Slaughter

Man tapping a tuning fork on another man's knee

Industrial Injuries Benefit.

Patent Office: ". . . It's a phoneless cord."

"Some people say you can't put a price on a wife's twenty-seven years of loyalty and devotion. They're wrong."

'Quit if you want, Bowman, but the intellectual property stays here.'

'I knew it! Important Exclusion 347, 'Plummeting Pachyderms'. . .'

"Of course he's smiling, he spent all the company profits before he died."

Playing doctor: 'This time I get to play the HMO bureaucrat who decides if you live or die.'

'Exhibit A: the oxygen tube that came loose the night she died. You were there that night. You wanted to play then, too.'

"I thought SAT was 'Smart Alec Teacher'!"