Fraction Enthusiast Gifts

I'm introducing fractions today. I hope at least half the class will understand the lesson.

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

'Einstein, the children are getting too complex for me.'

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

'But I digress...'

Can't Do the Math/Won't Do the Math.

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

"But everyone is befuddled by math."

The Life of Pi

'I got 100 in school today. 50 in history and 50 in maths.'

'I know we're inchworms, but let's get into the spirit of this! Change is good!'

"I know it may be wrong, but it's how I feel."

"Or we could tally the sheep like this."

'I know! It's what I had last night for dinner.'

"I'm going to prove that Math comes in handy later in life."

"Gifted class, indeed! One is gifted in science, but can't rad - one is fixed in reading, but won't even try math..."

'Maths is fun!'

The theory that ‘Time is Relative' came to the professor during a Decelerated Math Class.

"Manhatten Brooklyn Hoboken Long Island"

"Next time be more careful where you put the decimal point!"

'190 divided by two...'

'Unemployed math grad. Will solve quadratic equations for food."

Mr. Defner's drive-in algebra class was retro cool, controversial and somewhat effective.

"Six out of ten statisticians prefer to be in the majority."

Common Core Family Therapy

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

'If 'x' is unknown, why should I rock the boat?'

School. I like solving problems with X's and Y's, so I'll probably go into either math or genetics!

"When the teacher explained negative numbers, I suddenly understood how politicians 'deficit spend'."

Staff Yearbook

'Dad 'If Jack brought 10,000 shares at $3 and he sold 75% of them to Larry for $8 before the value went down to $2, what did Jack end up with?''

Math Teacher

"That was Copernicus on the phone – he says you're NOT the centre of the universe!"

'According to our fact finding committee, our stock won't be worth a dime this quarter.'

"I'm Albert, your new mathematics teacher, but you can call me Al."