Form Warrior Gifts

'I'd like the short form instead...'

'All these stupid forms! -- You self-employed guys make me sick!'

Online form - Submit.

Ban on Free Speech

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

"I witnessed something I can never unsee." "What happened, little buddy?" "Some guy walking out of the 'Wolverine' premiere shouted spoilers to the crowd that was waiting to see the second show." "A bunch of the fans who were dressed in costumes got so angry they attacked him." "I don't think I can ever unsee five Pyros and a Colossus beating a Happy Hogan with plastic flamethrowers." "Happy Hogan had it coming."

"I came here to get in shape, young man! What does me picking up your bar bill have to do with it?"

Tell me about it--last night I ate a whole sleeve of Communion wafers.

'The worst thing is not having access to your e-mail.'

'A representative will be with you in twelve minutes... so, if you have to go to the bathroom, please go now...'

"I'm so happy to be back in the workforce I'll never complain out loud again about Mondays."

"And that, gentlemen, is the Friday 4.55 pm Bad News Email Dump."

"I hit reply all too many times."

'I delete so much junk mail, my trash can icon turned into a dumpster.'

'There's a gentleman here who's concerned because you haven't responded to not one of his 12 million email spams.'

When collective bargaining is outlawed!: 'To work here, you have to wear this metal collar!'

Ed Revere, Spam Courier

"Well that email could have been a meeting."

Censorship is killing free society.

'Well, no wonder I feel blocked.'

'As you know, this is a Right-To-Work-Cheap-OR-we-send-your-job-to-Asia-state...'

"I only wish emails could deliver papercuts."

"Work with me!"

'We're looking for someone who would be comfortable toiling in obscurity for at least thirty years.'

"Our planet no longer wants to receive email from yours."

"Great. Now I have to worry about my weight."

Amateur Spam.

'No, now I'm just fighting inbox inequality."

"This the nastiest email that I ever read. I want to use it as our new template."

Woman weighing herself sitting on a chair.

'It's the paperwork you need to fill out to show that we're focussing on patients needs.'

E-mail message - You have a message that isn't junk!

"All right, back to answering e-mails and sighing."

Out of office.

"How many of these 'email blasts' are we talking about, General."