Form Completion Gifts

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'I ace 'wheeling' but I flunked 'dealing'' - Boy on leaving Business Administration.

Rita's PhD defense wasn't going well."

"So from the top. If they need urgent help it's form AC/765c, criticl interventions are CV/U657's and..."

Sue's job involved a certain amount of paperwork.

"People whinge about the irrelevance and duplication of paperwork, but if the forms aren't filled out how are we supposed to know how many forms have been completed?"

"Where would we BE without the right DOCUMENTATION...?"

"And when my head hits the dashboard, I want you to pass me a compensation claim form."

"Oh I don't work here, I just love filling out forms."

'Your book has a wonderful, timely quality. We're putting it on our list for a 2009 release.'

Bureau of Red Tape

"Hope you know how fortunate you are...next year's tax forms get complicated..."

"Please fill out these medical forms, which are identical to the ones you filled out earlier online, and have the exact same questions your doctor will ask you later in the exam room."

'A lot of it about - repetitive strain injury caused by ticking boxes. . .'

"It drives me MAD when staff complain about filling out 'pointless' forms. . . I mean if they DON'T fill out pointless forms when asked HOW are we supposed to know how many forms have been FILLED OUT?"

"These are the forms you need to fill out to show that our primary focus is client care."

'I've been here for 30 years. I've forgotten what my exact role is, but I do finally know how to fill out all the forms.'

"Simplified application form? This IS the simplified application form..."

"It's painful to watch...seeing someones dreams crushed...all their long cherished hopes and expectations dashed!"

Need help getting through the paperwork?

'You come in for one thing, and they get you filling in all kinds of forms...'

IRS Auditing, 10 loopholes or less.

Tax time is simply disgusting.

Clancy: Meeting with the Bank Manager

'You want an extension? In the middle of the war on terrorism!'

'New rules. You must declare last year's refund as income this year.'

"Oh, you haven't done anything wrong as far as we know - This is just a PREEMPTIVE audit."

"Your appointment's at 2:00 but you'll need to be here by 11:00 to start filling out the forms."

"So tell me everything you just filled in on the form out there."

"You fool! Don't you know it's the day after tax day?"

'I've dotted the t's and crossed the i's, put my occupation in the address box and telephone number in my date of birth box, let me know if there's anything correct here and I'll come back to balls it up'

"Just complete this paperwork and we will notify you if you qualify to apply for the grant..."

'What people don't appreciate is that if you don't have middle managers to oversee forms like the 566/c4-566 then you wouldn't even know how many 566/c4-566 had been filled out.'