Forgiveness Explorer Gifts

'It's true that my wife does forgive and forget - the trouble is that she never forgets what she's forgiven...'

'I SAID I was sorry!'

Church leader at desk has 3 boxes marked 'Black', 'White' and 'Gray Area'.

"Thanks for walking a mile in my shoe but it's beginning to hurt now."

"Remember that time you tried to kill me?"

"I can't decide if we're good people who are bad at communicating, or monsters who communicate perfectly."

"Your son is asking a lot of questions about the giant hands in the sky that controls everything."

"Postwar is hell."

Kid to pastor: 'Which office is heaven?'

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

'Is that where you keep the banned books?'

'You'll never believe this - they've found the actual body of Jesus!'

"Have mercy on me, Mama. Have mercy on Mr. Pitiful."

A surprise in heaven

"I see you're back from church. What was cherry-picked for you today?"

"Mainstream? Who's to say what's mainstream?"

'God's forgiveness of sins ... is that like a spiritual bailout program?'

"We've both made mistakes, Doug, but I consider the appetizers to be a thing of the past."

'Do you believe in reincarnation?' - 'I don't now, but I did when I was Napoleon.'

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

"What a sad species humans are!"

'The good news is that it's not your fault.'

Community church - the home of religion lite - Sermon: 'Atheism? You may be right!'

'We finally learned to communicate, and he's worse than I thought he was!

'Please forgive me for anything I've said or left unsaid.'

"Sure, it's Good News, but is it fake news?"

'One really nice thing up here is that it's always very easy to get an audience with a Pope.'

'To be honest, it's a bit hard to swallow.'

"Pray only for peace, love, strength and forgiveness. Never, ever spam the Lord."

God is for life not just for Christmas.

'No, I didn't get a presidential pardon, but I got something better. God has forgiven me.'

"She can forgive Nixon, but she can't forgive me."

'I really don't need to go to church, Reverend -- I feel guilty enough without it.'

'On the other hand, you must never, ever work in mysterious ways.'

Jesus plays peek-a-boo with doubting Thomas.