Force Aficionado Gifts

"And the winner is… Dan the Man by a nose!"

'And what part of the formula don't you understand?'

Like lambs to the slaughter, my ass.

'Some people just aren't cut out for adventure gaming, Bruno — maybe you should try chess or checkers.'

"It's a jungle out there... and I hear you're an expert."

'God's speed.'

Cheesie Rider

'I can't stand to see an animal in pain....'

If aliens' first contact is with a dad...

'We will conduct the background check. Our fortune, Madame Zula, will conduct a complimentary future check.'

Captain Pointy No.38 - Fan club meeting a trap

"Yeah, I won the Finest Quality Wool award, but it was a tough competition: There were contestants from all over Australia and New Zealand..."

'What did I tell you about getting caught on the ropes?'

The Horse Races

'Oh, I'm very fast, but my dad's problem is that I'm not competitive at all...'

"Howard's gone on the Tour de France without his bicycle again."

Tractor Art

'What, no onion rings?'

Doorway for Hats at Ascot

'I just invented walking upright, and already I got a charlie horse!'

"I have bad knees."

'Any chance of making this a 'catch and release', officer?'

"How about that! Wanda, you also landed on cheese."

Formula One

'How did it go at the track today, dear?'

"Now remember if anyone asks... You're the navigator."

'Don't let any SUV's pass us.'

The chess pieces that fell off the chequered flag

'I don't think his fists can take much more of the punishment your head's inflicting on them.'

Builders fighting over projects.

John's snail was a non-starter!

Owner: 'Why didn't you ride as I told you? Didn't I tell you to force the pace early and come away at the corner?' Jockey: 'Yes m'Lord, but I couldn't very well leave the horse behind.'