Form Aficionado Gifts

"We ned to do something about excessive admin...I want you to fill out one of these forms every time you think you're doing some."

"Staff are always complaining about supposed bureaucracy, but if no one completed form M74/cd3 then how would we know how many M74/cd3's had been filled out?"

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

"There's smart phones and smart cars, so why can't there be smart rooms that clean themselves?"

"Meet the author"

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

"He's taught himself work-life balance."

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

'If only every year was an election year.'

'...and in 1/100000 of a second, it can compound the programmer's error 87,500 times.'

"If you're smart enough to design a robot to do your homework, then you're certainly smart enough to just do your homework."

"Hey, remember a few days ago, when all this was unacceptable?"

'Let me see your portfolio of stolen ideas.'

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

"Two vegans, please."

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

"Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity."

Driverless cars rage.

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

"I'm seeing some dominance issues."

"I fear one day our jobs will be taken over by technology."

'And what part of the formula don't you understand?'

"But if you change your system preferences to match mine, is it really love?"

"What did you download at school today?"

"Ralph's smart car not only drives better than he does, it also works better. So we fired him and hired the car."

"He's the best our AI recruitment algorithm could fund, unfortunately our AI is really stupid."

'Ugh! Another oil puddle in the living room – bad robot dog!'

Bot Art: After da Vinci

'Yes, it computed the answer in a bilionth of a second and printed it instantly, but until I find my glasses...'

"The robots have become self-aware and self-loathing. Now all they do is write novels."

"Of course I failed you — your essay was original and unique and obviously written by a human."

"Your feelings may be artificial, but that doesn't mean they're not real."