Ensemble Aficionado Gifts

Mrs Auchinlek was glad her husband had other interests besides the Highlands Wind Ensemble.

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

Demure lady with gloves

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

"There's smart phones and smart cars, so why can't there be smart rooms that clean themselves?"

"Meet the author"

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

"He's taught himself work-life balance."

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

Pirate

"After the show, I'll be autographing any computer or phone screens where my albums are streamed."

'As our new company logo, I'm not quite sure it's sending out the right message.'

'If only every year was an election year.'

'...and in 1/100000 of a second, it can compound the programmer's error 87,500 times.'

Red Letter Days - A declaration of love in public

"If you're smart enough to design a robot to do your homework, then you're certainly smart enough to just do your homework."

Owing to a clerical error, Luciano Pavarotti receives kudus instead of kudos for his performance as the Duke of Mantua.

Back to school.

"Hey, remember a few days ago, when all this was unacceptable?"

'Let me see your portfolio of stolen ideas.'

Driverless cars rage.

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

Scarpia from Tosca

Silly wig.

Mikado

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

Child's Drawing (With Elephantiasis)

Wotan with eye patch

"I fear one day our jobs will be taken over by technology."

"Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity."

Little Buttercup HMS Pinafore

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

Sir Joseph Porter, KCB, First Lord of the Admiralty HMS Pinafore

"What did you download at school today?"