Football Trainer Gifts

Mole on football pitch asks: 'What's up, am I offside?'

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"Good game."

"You think you can? Think again, mister. You know you can. Got that?"

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

You only have time for one: Choose your fighter - Exercise, Wash Your Hair, Eat, Breathe

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

I'm going to practice on you before I start managing other people.

"Any questions?"

"This feels like an accomplishment."

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

'Run, run, as fast as you can!'

"I'm not sure about this new trainee - he asked me when does he get to see the actual ropes."

"It's a new work-out video. It shows a mother chasing after three little children all day."

'Another football scholarship offer?'

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

Powerful Love.

"Exercise ball? No thanks, I'm growing my own."

'Will you lot come out! - the new kit's not that bad!'

How to deliver a successful presentation.

"Any questions?"

'One of the new targets is targeting which targets we're meant to target.'

'OK, everybody, calm down,,,'

Walking a dog on a treadmill.

For speedy operation and ease of control get a pony.

A Sticky Buns Bakery is positioned next to a gym.

Even good cholesterol can develop an unhealthy sports addiction...

Football

"Give him time, - if anyone can break that swing set, it's O'l Tex."

'We need you to get onto those high balls coming over'

"I'm not using my jumper as a goalpost, sir, I'm using it as a jumper."

"And the winner is… Dan the Man by a nose!"

I think this interleague play is getting out of hand.