Football Field Fan Gifts

"Something's trying to get through the Astroturf!"

Football fan

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

Football Chameleon

Pregnant Cheerleaders,

'Unbelievable, these guys brought a ringer.'

'Let's give it five more minutes. If they haven't eased up on the lasers by then, we'll have to postpone the game.'

"Uptight End"

"Tunnel of love"

Supermarket - World Cup Specials

Men playing water football in barrels on a lake

'David when we said we would like you to be a role model for us. . .'

Birds doing the 'wave'.

Archaeologists discover a football

"He's starting to flag a bit"

Tunnel of Whale Guts

'Now what?!'

'Blimey, boss - that's a bit revolutionary, isn't it?'

"Yes, I've made three resolutions - not to drink less, not to stop watching football on telly and not to spend more time at your mother's."

'Well it's too bad you're not a black widow like me, Slyvia...'

'Okay, men, let's go out and win one for the flipper.'

Hammer Thrower - "Let go of it!"

'Touchdown!'

'Your direction is good! Now try for distance.'

'No we didn't get high definition TV - the wife dusted the screen.'

Football Violence

Centaur Sprinter

A well-known poet lives on this street. Building Supplies. I just need one. She authored a prize-winning screenplay. That offensive lineman is a novelist. My journalist friend is rejecting calls from my number. It's frustrating. I just can't escape writer's block.

Red Card - Gold Card.

Yoga. My goal in yoga is the same as the goal of defensive football players. Bend but don't break.

'I'd do better if I knew all the words you know!'

'And if the scores remain level, you can text the name of the team you want to keep in the tournament.'

"Go deep!"

Referee cop.