Football Feaster Gifts

European Super League

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

"Regular service or affected?"

'For the first 500 calories of what we are about to receive, make us truly thankful.'

The feeding frenzy has begun, gorging ourselves on bowl after bowl of college football.

'What makes you think we want to sell you son.'

"A pillow fight? They really have taken the violence out of the game."

'Diet? Yeah I'm on a prop's diet...pies,chips,burgers and coke!'

'No, there's nothing else: At this time of year, we eat salmon!'

"Seeing as you've been so generous giving goals away lately, you're down to play Santa at the Christmas party!"

Bowl Games.

"You want England to win what!? Put me back in the lamp!"

'They only keep him in the team because of his famous WAG!'

Kirks & Tacos

'Whoa! Don't try to be a hero. It's too late for Dan, but let this be a lesson...'

Antonio Carluccio.

"We had this last year."

"In time you will come to see that Football is ballet with taco chips."

"And the special tonight is...some kind of unpronounceable, convoluted, uncommon and rather bizarre green or other..."

Too full after after Christmas dinner!

"Could we have a doggy bag please?"

Wife leaving note 'midnight mass' on husbands distended stomache as she leaves house.

Football Drinks

Turkey Black Fridays.

'Leftovers...! Leftovers!'

American football has cheaters too.

'I hope everyone likes ostrich.'

The need to run from the table screaming, has reached it's peak about an hour ago and has now subsided into a tolerable level of anguish where I only occasionally want to smash a fork into my eye socket. . .

"He's say's he's eaten 200,000,000 mince pies, drank 150,000,000 glasses of wine, eaten 300,000,000..."

"I'm afraid I'm going to have to cancel your Thanksgiving."

"Venison... why do you ask?"

"This IS a friendly y'know..!"

Doggie dining table

'After that 24 hour beer and fruit cake binge, you need a radical detox!'

Turducken, Piecaken, Scaletalkin'