Foodie With A Beat Gifts

'The drum roll is very nice... but it's still leftovers.'

'..and we thank thee for these bio-engineered vegetables..'

"If you're tired of stegosaur, go kill something else."

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

Boneheads! I never said I was bringing ten condiments!

"Monsieur, si vous plaît. I'm sure I ordered the fusilli and not the Fusilier."

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poetry

"That's it. We’re toast."

Kung food restaurant (Waiter flies through the air bringing the food).

"Are your eel rolls electric?"

'Before I order breakfast, which way is it to the 'International Bathroom of Pancakes'?'

"I know, I know, every time we come here, I swear I'm going to try something new, but I always end up getting the same thing."

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

-'but for a full English breakfast you can't beat Blackpool,sir.'

"And we are proud to say we only use the freshest artificial ingredients."

"The spoon, he ran away with the goddam spoon."

'I've already been recruited by one of the top fast-food chains in the country!'

'So tell me why you think you're suffering from seasonal ineffective disorder.'

"Everything tastes better when it's cooked on the grill."

How about going easy on the carbs

'A wheel? No wonder I broke a tooth. I thought it was a donut.'

"You're lost. This is Mom's apple pie."

Advocado

Famous Jewish Blues Singer Series.

"...But ASIDE from that, how was your trip to France?"

Devil's food cake/Angel's food cake. Delivery mix-up.

"Can Johnny come out and eat?"

'Dial 1-900-Fortune.'

"At first glance this diet might seem boring but then you realize there are actually seven varieties of kale!"

'I'll have the bacon and hay wrap.'

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

Flying sauces.

Next time, a larger tip for the server and less free tax advice.

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"