Food Trend Followers T-Shirts

Big Turmeric

"Where can I find your organic, locally raised children?"

Gluten Free Dry Cleaning

"It's kohlrabi, the next hot vegetable."

"Where do we put Desserts?"

La Table

"You said the cauliflower is locally grown – would you elaborate?"

See you at the farmers market!

"Mom, I'm at work – let me call you back after I finish stocking milk for wealthy vegans who like beet juice in their meat alternatives so they can still get that bloody effect when cooking without guilt."

All Natural Nothing

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

Queen of Quinoa

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

"Is the MSG local?"

"You ordered the organic, unprocessed, whole wheat spaghetti?"

Happy Surrogate Thanksgiving

Spontaneous Kombucha

"I always end up buying way more black-truffle honey than I intended."

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

'If you're looking for compensatory materialism on wheels, look no further.'

"D'you remember caramel before it all became 'salted?'"

"For the first half hour, I was, like, really there. Enchanted. But I found the wild-quail confit so disappointing that not even the fig reduction on the poached pear could get me back."

"Can you reinvent the classic grilled cheese for me?"

"You'll find that as a restaurateur I've worked hard to showcase the finest in organic and free range ingredients that have been harvested and prepared in authentic and traditional ways."

Giraffe Selfie

"There must be a place we can wait on line for an hour before eating."

An alternative theory as to why dinosaurs are extinct.

"Everybody's doing quinoa—at least Kamut still has a nice grainier-than-thou quality."

"Nothing is organic, local or sustainable. Now, can we get started?"

"Here we go again, every 30,000 years or so this Paleo diet becomes a fad."

"Fridge-to-table"

Cinema with a salad bar in its lobby.

'Bad news! More people are switching from red meat to fish!'

'It's one of those trendy 'warm salads,' with sausage, fried eggs, bacon and black pudding.'

"It's natural, vegan organic, no additives, preservatives or cooking."