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"Don't worry...the national immigrant work stoppage does not include our kitchen."

LAY ZEE FUK

"Behold! As I transform this family size frozen lasagna into a meal for one."

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

Hungry child

'A little piece of advice, Verl. . . cut your sandwich loaf on a diagonal . . . that way people will think they're gettin' more.'

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

'I cleaned over thirty fish today.' - 'That takes guts.'

'But Mom, I like potatoes in their jackets.'

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

PREPARING A POMEGRANATE FOR DUMMIES

Horn of Leftovers

Wendy likes horses...and she is a keen cook.

Frank and Ernie's Diner. We're all out of pressed duck, sir, but I can put the squeeze on some chicken for you.

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

"There are no croutons. I use tater tots on my salad."

"Karen's idea of wine reduction..."

Surprise in the salad bowl

“Our numbers grow greater and greater. Soon the era of the spices will be at hand”

Recipe involving the switching off of the smoke alarm...

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

"Who shaves the fennel in your family?"

'I don't know how much more of this I can take!'

"This alphabet soup is in Times New Roman. I ordered Segoe Script! May I please speak to the chef?"

"Just one more outburst and I can have this chicken tenderized."

Culinary surgery.

Bonita shows up late for the girls' Thursday night 'Jam Session'.

A butcher and his apprentice.

Macho Vegetarian

The simultaneous development of dining and pomposity.

'Are you sure you don't have any Indian blood?.'

"All good things must come to an end...unless I use both of my giant-size super-pots."

On Sale Today Free Range Chickens...Back In One Hour.