Food Photo Curator T-Shirts

"I don't like the food here, but the photos I paot make my friends envious."

"Just bring me something that's going to look good on social media."

Squirrels Stockpiling Mulling Spices for Winter

"Waiter, can you heat this up? The wild salmon got cold while I was posting it to Instagram."

"May I recommend our Seared Filet with Lobster Cream Sauce? It's very photogenic."

"This deserves an Instagram photo. Would you mind taking a picture of someone washing the dishes when I'm done?"

Avocado Timeline

"My instagram feed is basically people, dog food, and tennis balls."

"Ooh, that looks delicious! Does it photograph well?"

"I'll have the sticky rack of ribs for my main course and something vegan for my Instagram post."

'Amazing this pizza looks just like a brain scan of someone who's experiencing apophenia'

'...or, if you're watching your cholesterol, we also have thousand-year-old egg substitutes.'

"Something photogenic for each of us."

"I am off duty, but the body cam allows me to discreetly take photos of my meal."

"Just a heads-up, the Mushroom and Crab Risotto doesn't like its photo taken."

"I wonder how many Facebook likes I'll get."

"In this restaurant, quality control means I must approve every picture you take of the food."

Almost Everything Bagel

'Oy! Zadie, I think we need a bigger house!'

'Care to form a splinter group?'

"Just eat me, you intolerable pervert!"

"I'm watching my sugar intake."

Food Photography

"I love the splatter effect you got with the green. What brush did you use?"

"I'm a little disappointed. Tastes fine, but not very photogenic."

Craft A Yummy, Grammable Cocktail.

"Sometimes, just to agitate them, I flash my jar on instant coffee."

"No. I don't want to eat it. Just post it on social media."

"This gnocchi with sage butter looks nothing like my friend's Instagram photo."

"Would it be possible for you to take a photo of my meal and post it on social media?"