Food Jargon Enthusiast T-Shirts

"You say 'potato' I say 'dehydrogenated on vegetable flavoured product enhancer.'"

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"And isn't it time we replaced the worn-out, meaningless cliches in our mission statement with some dazzlingly new meaningless cliches?"

"This report is mumbo jumbo...I asked for gobbledeeegook!"

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

'Er . . . and a fork for me...'

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

Elfian lady grilling on mushroom: 'Summertime in the Enchanted Forest'.

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

"Our detractors call it suburban sprawl, but I prefer thinking of our plan as 'sustainable over-development!'"

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

Stressed employee says to colleague: 'I think I'm on top of the situation and I hope I'm in the loop, but I can't seem to get ahead of the curve.'

Party time.

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

"Here comes a client I must speak to. Excuse me while I slip into some jargon."

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

Baker Romance

"It's smells so good, but why do you have to wait so long?!"

'And from what we've been able to determine, this is the tweak that broke the paradigm's back.'

'I was in the catering corps.'

"What time did you say you wanted me to start drinking?"

"We've misjudged the tapas again."