Foodie Linguist T-Shirts

'Fondants and cervelats gave the foodie ataraxy.'

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

The British Territory of the South Sandwich Islands.

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

'I think I'll go home and eat'

'Lining my pockets with aluminum foil so I can sneak Thanksgiving leftovers home.'

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

'Yes, I am impressed at how fast you got here, but where's my pizza?'

'Would you care for some fresh pepper? Well too bad, because all we have is these dried up old peppercorns.'

"I'm just the bus boy but I'll be ignoring you also."

'Hard to follow...'

"The prices they charge here, you'd expect them to have an oven not just a gas ring!"

Man says: 'Great pizza, but the mozzarella was a bit stringy.'

Never write a sonnet on an empty stomach

"I don't know where to begin, each dish has its own app."

"May I offer you a side of life insurance?"

"We suggest you study the menu in our reading room before being seated in the dining room."

'We just invented cooking yesterday, and already she's serving leftovers!'

"Bill just does celebrity cook-books these days, that's where the real money is."

'The Specials are the same as the Main Menu dishes, but with more florid descriptions.'

Seafood: "Of course our food is fresh."

You are what you eat (Nuts).

'This is gluten free, isn't it?'

Weight Loss Counselor, out for a 400 calorie lunch.

'And it comes with oven mitts, butter, sour cream and chives.'

NASA, 'I thought YOU were bringing a can opener!'

"[Old Steak Bone Tavern]"

Ordering Food At A French Restaurant.

'You can't call it a miracle drug just because you added miracle whip!'

'Today's special is yesterday's left-overs.'

Uncle Giving Boy a Mince Pie