Food Eating Contests Gifts

Donut Eating Contest

'Oh, and I suppose I'm the only one who's ever heard it's a 'dog eat dog world'?'

Tension filled the tent.

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

Competitive Eating Competition Competitive Vomiting Competition,

"Keep in mind, this dish is best served in a restaurant cooked by anyone other than you."

"Well, I'm the company sports champion! During the lunch break I ate more hamburgers than any other colleague!"

Al's Diner. Special: Spaghetti. All You Can Eat $3.95. Ernie, don't play with your food unless you're sure you can win.

A convenient attack of swine flu...

"I want to set the world record for eating the most empanadas ever!"

'Rhea of the Year.'

The BLTR (the bacon, lettuce, tomato, revolution)

It had taken a team of engineers at IBM over a decade and had cost more than 50 million dollars, but that nigh, when Eat-Bot 4000 finally broke the record for hot dogs in an hour, it was all worth it.

Prune Eating Contest: Last Man Standing.

"@#!!!%$ the critics!! Give me Bobby $#@!! Flay!!"

I won! I finished my pizza first! Want to make it two out of three?

Pig Cheese

"Did you order a starter?"

Cooking Contest. I hear you can make tempura out of anything. Yep -- Anything you can do, I can do battered!

'Congratulations. You're our 15th caller. The grant is yours!'

All you can eat buffet...speed limit: 750 calories per minute

"Everything bagel?"

'We did it, Dad! We won the heaviest frog award!'

'A dozen bagels, please. For here.'

Man reading letter, 'You may already be a winner' about to step on rake.

"It's the last of the Chef's Special. He says he'll arm-wrestle you for it."

Bear in hotdog eating contest.

I must say, that's the most pathetic bar promotion I've ever seen. Tuesdays! Wet Socks Contest!

"Patient continues to entertain the sincere delusion that apple pie served with a slice of cheese on top is delicious..."

Contest time. Mort and Sadie, our ornery octogenarians, have decided to rename Rudy's generation. Mort favors Generation I - for impatient. Sadie prefers Generation V - for virtual. Or vapid! What do you think? Please send your own ideas to asksadieshow@gmail.com. C'mon people, get thinkin'!

State Fair. Fun. You won a ribbon in the eating contest? What for? Honorable munchin'!

A thanksgiving dinner in a boxing ring

No soliciting - unless you're one of those sweepstakes

"If you kids must have food fights, try not to do it when the cafeteria is serving soup."

'Keep complaining about my meals and you can fry your own salad!'