Food Chain Fanfic T-Shirts

"Yeah it's me again. Did you want the orange ones or the white ones?"

Vegetarian Birds

Dolphin friendly tuna

"I thought there would be bacon here."

"This is our soft opening."

"For drinks or dinner?"

'Humans do it, why couldn't we? Instead of chasing food, we could breed it: It's all explained in my report...'

"Where's my order!? This service is terrible! That stuff will be cold by the time it gets here!! What's the hold-up!?!"

'I just like tequila for the worm.'

'I wasn't going to eat him, but then he tripped right in front of me.'

Cook au vin

"Aaah, early morning, my favourite part of the day..."

Large Very Fresh Eggs

'If I had to kill to survive I'd become a vegetarian.'

"Dad, that's horrible! I'm not trying to roast them: I'm studying them for a school project. . ."

"I had them sharpened so I can eat cows."

A small fish's unnatural protection against predatory birds.

"Skunk! How is it?"

Pelican with wheels on it's beak.

"Yes, it was a lovely meal wasn't it? I used a marvellous new caterer called 'pest control'."

'I'm putting you on a zebra free diet.'

"What do you mean 'What's for lunch'? You're a bee eater!"

"A Mister 'Ty Gurr' wants to reserve a table next to our fattest customer."

"He damaged a nerve when he pulled the thorn out. I'd have had a surefire malpractice suit if I hadn't eaten him."

Two sharks are following some 'carrot fish' - 'I don't care if they're good for my eyesight... I'm not eating a carrot fish!'

"Hold on ... I think a table's about to open up."

"Do you remember what you had for lunch last Thursday?"

"Hey Bob, come quick, I've found a carcass, and big bonus: It's crawling with maggots!"

"Once koalas taste shark, they never go back to eucalyptus."

When the predator becomes the prey.

'I'll have the Wildebeest.'

"Spoiler alert, Bob. If you need to carbon-date you lunch it's spoiled."

"Forget about a vacation at the beach: Fish would stop us from going in the water and seagulls would spot us on the beach..."

Cycle of Death and Life.

"Well, it's about time. I was just about to send out for pizza!"