Flooded Humor Fans Pillows

'Oh look, the tide is coming in.'

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

"Oh my gosh, honey! Look out!"

'I don't like heights...maybe that's why I've had so many low points in my life.'

"That'll be five bucks."

"What are you looking at, four eyes?"

Tunnel of Love/Lover's Leap.

'A religious zealot denounces a toaster for working on the Sabbath'

Raised by Dogs

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

"Darling... I think the Baby's been eating the fridge magnets again."

"Cat World Domination Day June 24th"

"Congratulations. It's a chick."

Two fishermen land on stumps. Man says to other, 'Is that enough structure for ya?!'

Ahh! The sounds of nature! Peep peep. Tweet tweet! Twitter. Croak croak. Sniff sniff. Ribbit. Human nature. Twitter twitter. Tippity tap tap. Cackle cackle! Bleep bleep.

Stairlift around cliff face.

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

"I can never remember - do these go in garbage or compost?"

Unemotional Support Animal

Dickens & Tolstoy Walk into a Bar: " . . . so, to make a short story long . . . "

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

'In my time, we didn't talk to a blackberry. We just ate the damn things!'

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

'We found you in a cabbage!'

"We have plenty of time to catch the ark."

'Hon, I'm home!'

6,000 BC: Neolithic Barbecue

'We were thinking of naming him after his daddy, but I don't really like the name, Old slap head.'

Stormy weather

Tequila Mockingbird

Humans Queue To Use Portable Toilet While Dogs Queue To Use Tree Portable Toilet

'I was told you two have a love-hate relationship. Care to elaborate on that?'

"WOW, we're on top of the world!"

"You want to know why I drink?. . . I drink to forget!"

Technique #54 airlines are adopting for handling excessive carry on luggage.