Flood Survivor Wannabe Gifts

Noah wears hearing protection as animals howl.

'I don't care what the blueprints say, I'm certain HE strongly suggested a roof.'

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

'I won't let global warming change my lifestyle.'

"Oh no! This chimney needs re-pointing."

'Expecting a bit of wet weather Reg...?'

'...and the property lies in a beautiful valley by the banks of the river...'

'Well, you always said you wanted a water feature for the garden.'

'Two pencils approach Noah's ark.'

'Damn! I was saving that for a rainy day!'

"Next year I'm planting rice instead of potatoes"

"I thought you meant we had a security leak."

"Every once in a while this house comes with a pool."

'Have you filed an environmental impact statement for this flood?'

Climate Change Contingency House

"....rather than spend millions on a potentially fruitless effort to avoid flooding we've decided to focus on public safety!"

"When the rubber duck reaches eye level it's a flood. . . wow, brilliant!"

'Do you suppose we might qualify for asylum in Holland?'

'That Noah's some sailor, the World is covered in water and he runs aground!'

Flood-stricken woman saves goldfish

'Oy! Don't you realise there's a hosepipe ban?'

'I'll call you back. I'm out with the dog in the fields at the moment.'

"I don't get it. How come it's so cheap?"

'This doesn't look good!'

'Well, stop watching him if it makes you stress over flood insurance.'

'Did I or did I not say, no woodworm?!'

'This is a fine time to think we should have bought a houseboat!'

Mexico braces for more floods.

'My basement is flooded, so I figure, why stay home and stand in water when I can go fly fishing instead?'

Water Department Flood

'Quite a downpour wasn't it?'

Flooding

Next train: Deluged

"We've got water views again."

'After the first few floods our insurance company insisted we future-proof the house.'