Flatulence Humor Lovers Gifts

'Over on stage number two is the lovely, succulent, Misty Flatulence!'

"That new drug causes flatulence."

"Gerald converted the barbecue grill to natural gas."

'There is a kid at school who can play 'Jingle Bells' with his farts. That is impressive because flatulence is a difficult medium.'

"Kid, I'm begging you, please stop farting."

The Fart Side

"There ya go. Cushion rot from farting into the same old chair for 40 years"

'You have Drattus Flatulence, or what we commonly call 'Darn Tootin'!'

Pardon Me

After having had beans at the last motorway cafe...The lorry driver hadn't realized gasses had built up in his cab.

'Relax, I'm only going to open a window.'

'Do Not Pass' and 'Gas'.

It's a wind farm.

'Next time the captain says to turn off your cell phone, just do it!'

'Normally, he's an indoor dog, but he got into the bean dip.'

"I think that new dog food gives him gas!"

"No beans for you, you're on a fart free diet."

"Forgive me, Father ... I forgot to take my Beano."

"What is it, Lassie? You say Connor both smelt it and dealt it?!"

"Thank you for the lovely dinner, Perry. Would you like to come in for a stool softener?"

Caution! Big Butt Ahead and I Just Ate Beans!

'I've been a flatulence analyst for 15 years. . . I'll quit when it stops being fun. . .'

'Hello? 911! Come quick! My husband is having a fart attack!'

Your ability to work under pressure is evident.

Leave it to Boomer

'I'm afraid we're out of whisky, sir -- the pilot drank it all.'

The International Guffing Championships were poised on a knife edge. Farty Old Grandad was beating Farty Old Dog by a single 'Eggy Special'

"Harry's putting is not the only thing that stinks!"

"...and this one keeps my flatulence under control."

"This asks if I have "excessive gas". What constitutes "excessive?"

'Houston, we have a problem...' - Astronaut farting.

"That explains a lot."

'He's having a fart attack.'

Flopsy wakes up one day and suddenly realizes why she never succeeded at anything.

"Think of how ashamed they'd be if they knew their Father hogged the restroom key."