Fitness Underdog Gifts

'You didn't train for this marathon, did you?'

"This feels like an accomplishment."

The trauma of losing.

'It was at this point that the executive group began its hatha flow retreats.'

An old man exercising with hourglasses

'The doctor said you need more exercise, so I've hidden the remote control.'

Yoga for beginners,

"I did seize the day. But then it seized me right back and used some kind of jujitsu move to flip me on my ass."

'If God had wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them closer to my hands!'

'This game is going to be a character-building experience.'

"My body is a temple... unfortunately it's in ruins"

'Three days, four different avoidance routines.'

'You know that thin person inside you, struggling to get out? -- He seems to have gained weight, too.'

"I've had enough of character building, Dad. Can I support a successful team now?"

"Surprising, I've never seen a case of repetitive strain injury of the buttock's beffore."

'It's just a recliner with built-in heart rate monitor. But look at how many big inflatable balls are sold as exercise equipment.'

No wonder kickboxing seems so hard.

'Flipping the remote and clicking the mouse are his low-impact aerobics.'

Bored with yoga, the very fittest neighborhood moms start up a "Running with Furniture" club.

'...all been inspired by the Olympics...now touch those toes...touch those...'

"Now bend forward to touch floor between feet- try to keep knees straight."

"You don't have to sell the farm. There are people who will pay money to lift and carry big tires."

'Oh, Fred does exercise. He takes frequent walks to the refrigerator.'

Snowperson Yoga

A Muscle checking out some shirts made for Muscles

"Changing your Facebook profile does not count as exercise!"

"I swapped my 'couch to 5K' training app for a '5K to couch' one!"

'I've got to get in shape. I visited a fitness website and now I'm sore.'

'The only time I ever worked up a sweat in there was just then, when I tried to cancel my membership!'

"The swim team is really feeling those school budget cuts."

'Very good, Now ten more reps...and a one, and a two and ...'

'Doctor, when you said you were going to put me on an exercise program, this is not what I had in mind.'

'Yeah? Well my personal trainer can beat up your personal trainer!'

"A diet that really works? Eat less, exercise more."

'Our 'Resolution Membership' is a no-obligation contract, complete with unscheduled workouts and spotty routines that fit anyone with weak, annual ambitions.'