Fitness Journey Pillows

'I think dad's getting fitter. I couldn't hear him wheezing until he turned the corner today.'

A mid-lithe crisis.

Before and After diet photos.

"I can't give enlightenment, only great calves."

"Why settle for itsy-bitsy when you could be swole as hell?"

"I wonder if she enjoyed losing weight as much as I enjoyed gaining it."

"You're really serious about that diet!"

"At what point does slow jogging become walking?"

'I AM going to join a gym, but I've got to get in shape first. . .'

"I try to watch what I eat, but my eyes aren't what they used to be."

'Hey, Chuck! You look GREAT! Lose weight?...Workin' out?...Sex change?'

"The power's out again? So what do you do when that happens?"

"I finally achieved my perfect body."

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

On the back of the t-shirt...

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

"This feels like an accomplishment."

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

'You need to stay away from the pie in the sky.'

'If you exercise you add 10 years to your life.' - 'But I would spend the 10 years exercising.'

Exercise now!

'What'll it cost me to got in shape for yardwork season?'

Exercise Bars

'It was at this point that the executive group began its hatha flow retreats.'

Zoo. Diet Clinic. Hey everybody --- There's no longer an 800-pound gorilla in the room!

Tired executive going into gym coming out gleaming

'Swimming is the healthiest sport. . . Because it's the only one where you can't smoke while you're doing it.'

'I won't tell my thighs if you don't..'

Gym. It doesn't help when you call the ab workout a "journey to the center of the girth."

Gym. You lost a pound this week? It's only because I always leave here too tired to go looking for it!

'The doctor said you need more exercise, so I've hidden the remote control.'

"When I suggested you should walk a couple of miles a day I didn't mean to just see me!"

Man on beach realizes laying down flattens his stomach

Guy in gym