Fitness Journey Explorers Gifts

"MMPHH. . . I said I don't think I'm built for yoga!"

'Okay, ladies! We're not just going to burn those calories, we're going to drown them!'

"This feels like an accomplishment."

'It was at this point that the executive group began its hatha flow retreats.'

Yoga for beginners,

'I think dad's getting fitter. I couldn't hear him wheezing until he turned the corner today.'

"I want you to learn from my mistakes."

"Why settle for itsy-bitsy when you could be swole as hell?"

"I picked up an exorcize DVD by mistake."

Obese man using a exercise machine. His false teeth are flying out.

"At what point does slow jogging become walking?"

'Yes, yes, yes, now seriously, what can we do to improve our health?'

A mid-lithe crisis.

"I can't give enlightenment, only great calves."

"I try to watch what I eat, but my eyes aren't what they used to be."

Bull Treadmill

'I AM going to join a gym, but I've got to get in shape first. . .'

"The gods really love tight buns."

"Well we COULD tell people to eat less and exercise more, but where's the money in that?"

"You exercise with your phone?"

Before and After diet photos.

Stationary bicycles.

Bored with yoga, the very fittest neighborhood moms start up a "Running with Furniture" club.

'How much have you lost so far?', '$375.00'

"You're really serious about that diet!"

"Why do you call it a thyroid problem when it's been giving me an excuse for the 20 pounds I gained this year?"

Spring Training

"This is absurd!" "This is incredible!"

'Tom just had his first workout at the gym.'

"I'm the 'Before' in diet ads."

"The power's out again? So what do you do when that happens?"