Fitness Friend Gifts

Mouse in a wheel looks at directory.

"It's a good thing you came in when you did. If you had waited any longer, I might have had to make a house call."

'Wouldn't it be easier if we just got more heavier friends?'

"Opening and closing your fridge door 50 times a day doesn't qualify as exercise."

'I've had it with dieting! -- I lost two pounds last week and nobody noticed!'

"Oh I don't mind the jogging, but I think you tricked me. When you asked if I wanted to exercise, I thought you said, extra fries!"

"You know as well as I do that we don't go for a walk until after lunch,"

"I am sucking it in!"

"I agree. I do need more exercise after sitting on my butt all day in your waiting room!"

'Promise me you'll tell me if I gain a pound.'

'You have to employ me. . . I may be 17 but my wii fitness age is 62.'

'What you need is some negative growth.'

"If only legginess were based on circumference."

'I've met you before...I'm not good with names, but I never forget a pace!'

"I guess exercise will make me feel more energetic, but I feel like I'm wasting all my energy exercising!"

Moose is an environmental nightmare, Nana. I beg your pardon? The beef and cereal in his chow is worth 10,000 SUV miles. But consider his offsets. He cleans my floor with natural solvents. I don't need a power-sucking burglar alarm. He listens to all my problems, free of charge. And he saves me from having to join a gym. SO ... I am not ... reducing my canine footprint.

Happy new year, Ernie! Happy new year, Frank! This year I'm going to eat a healthy diet. Okay. I'm going to exercise more. Uh-huh. I'm going to get organized. Right. At least until Thursday or so. Then what? I'll resolve to leave well enough alone!

"Things that make me feel better/Things I'm too tired to do......Things that make me feel worse/Things I do when I'm tired.

"Let me help you, dear."

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

Businessman uses yoga moves while reviewing financial news on computer

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

"Uh-oh. My inner GPS is recalculating."

"I could catch a bicyclist, well maybe not a bicyclist, but I could catch a jogger, definitely."

'It's perfectly normal for middle-aged men to put on a little weight.'

Exercising

"He's a dedicated lifter, but he always skips leg day."

I feel better than ever physically but I'm totally obsolete at work. In life 60 is the new 40. In the workplace 40 is the new 60.

"Well, that will never be a yoga pose."

Reasonableman

"I run around this high school track every morning."