Fitness Excuse Maker Pillows

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

'Not just my homework - The dog chewed up my whole LAPTOP!'

'She thinks I'm out every night training for the London Marathon.'

"I'm exempt from the company fitness program. I have triplets at home."

"Hold on, hun... I'm just saying, losing four ounces in a month is better than gaining four ounces in a month!"

'I knew it was time to do something when I leapt from the stage to do some body surfing and the crowd parted.'

"You'll have to find another excuse. The vet said I should remove salt, fat and homework from my diet."

Homework flavored dog food

'My arms are getting shorter.'

Student to math teacher: 'My dog ate my homework and got arithmetics.'

"That's how you're getting your steps in, putting your fitness tracker on the dog?"

'I try and humour him...it's the only exercise he gets!'

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"

'Busy Dear ?' 'Just watching my exercise video.'

Procrastinator Hall of Fame

"Well, sometimes we take the dogs for a walk...which puts our fitness level at approximately that of an 80-year-old couple."

"Sorry we’re late, but apparently the journey of 1,000 miles begins with 'I know a shortcut around this traffic'."

Lame Lines

"My doctor told me I should start working out."

"I have to cancel our plans. I feel a headache coming on."

'BEWARE OF DOG (eats homework)'

"I agree, it is important to look good, but wearing high heels during a workout may be a little counter productive."

'But, dear, I am walking the dog.'

"My dog is a finicky eater. He refuses to eat my homework."

'In that case I'll do nothing!'

"I can’t even find the motivation to quit my gym membership."

"And the best feature of this shoe is you'll look Athletic even if you're not."

"Can you send me a detailed list of knee exercises I could do at home but won't because I have no discipline."

"The doctor wants me to exercise more, so I need you to lift my feet even more when you're not vacuuming."

"What already?! If it weren't for my extraordinary willpower, I'd be exercising right now!"

'Flipping the remote and clicking the mouse are his low-impact aerobics.'

New years resolutions