Fitness Enthusiast Chuckles Gifts

"Your health insurance only kicks in when you can run 100m in under 10 seconds."

"Can Johnny come out and eat?"

"Ok, let's get those knuckles up off the ground, arms way up high now, feet wide apart. . ."

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

Keep Fit.

Old Karate Master

"Today let's work on changing channels, drinking with a mouthful of food, and yelling at the TV all at the same time."

Woman weighing herself while holding balloons

No caption (A lumberjack runs on a rolling log in a machine built like a treadmill).

"My body is a temple... unfortunately it's in ruins"

"What already?! If it weren't for my extraordinary willpower, I'd be exercising right now!"

'Flipping the remote and clicking the mouse are his low-impact aerobics.'

"I am exercising. I'm doing some online walking around an online mall."

Check out my six pack.

"I said half-moon pose, not full moon!"

"Wanna go scroll on our phones at the gym?"

An overweight lazy man chooses to exercise on a motorbike at a gym.

'Like it'll do any good.'

attorney at law

"Year, I get a real workout with this exercise equipment. . . I'm constantly moving it out of my way!"

Just for laughs, let's throw a few folks off course.

'You didn't train for this marathon, did you?'

A Muscle checking out some shirts made for Muscles

Now on exhibit at the Museum of Discarded Exercise Equipment

'The only time I ever worked up a sweat in there was just then, when I tried to cancel my membership!'

"Same weight as you were in high school, great....now put the other foot on the scale too!"

'Congratulations. You're the world's first exercycle potato.'

'Now they're saying exercise doesn't cure depression.'

"No matter how much I workout, my arms still look sticks."

"I'm done - I only jog far enough to burn off the cheesecake I had for breakfast."

'Very good, Now ten more reps...and a one, and a two and ...'

home fitness/fatness

'The only exercise I'm getting is when I run amok.'

Broadband developments

Cardio? How am I supposed to incorporate cardio?