Fitness App Aficionados Pillows

"Remember me? I'm your running shoes. Remember what running is?"

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

"It's true: no more burpees."

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

"Lets find another beach, this one has too much competition."

"I have to rest. The 'check engine' light on my activity tracker just came on."

'I'm looking forward to parents' night. I'm going to ask these people their diet secrets.'

'Me? I took my cardio to the next level.'

Zumbie: Zumba for zombies.

"I have to get down to 125 pounds before I go back to my real gym."

"When I was your age, I had to ride fifteen miles on a little stationary bike while disco lights flashed and E.D.M. played in the background."

"That's awesome that you taught him to heel, but I just want him to walk normally."

Mouse on an Exercise Bike

Advanced aerobicizers wait till after class to aid the fallen.

'He's my personal potty trainer.'

Body Building

"Speed reader...?"

Dinosaurs ponder fad dieting prior to extinction.

The locker room door suddenly swings open, and Randy is busted by a steroid-sniffing dog.

'And one, and two, and three, and don't get discouraged Manatee, and four, and five...'

'Much like my hairline and waistline, our numbers are trending in the wrong direction.'

'Keep fit.'

If your dog is fat, you're not getting enough exercise.