Fish Tank Comedian Gifts

"Hang on a minute...That's not regular fish food...That's ECZEMA!"

reincarnated worm...

"Eww - that whale's breath smells awful!" "You could use a breath mint yourself, lady!"

"I have to refill it everyday. He has a tendency to retain water."

"My wife is the queen of misheard lyrics! Listen to her singing carefully next time: it's hilarious..."

"I knew we should have gotten the shorter tree."

Guide fish.

Of all the times for us to run in to team GB's Olympic synchronised swimming squad!

Another hot flash?

Shark Chum

Fish Farm.

'Ladies... gentlemen... I imagine you're all wondering why you've been invited to this think tank.'

"Are you new around here?"

'It's not art - I just overfed my goldfish!'

Snub Marine

"Is really wet, here!"

"I have to go on a diet! According to that fisherman I have gained fifty pounds overnight!!"

"Of course I'm self-absorbed. I'm a sponge!"

"Here he comes! Don't move."

How Lawyers Evolved.

Need to turn up heat(fish crowd heater in aquirium).

"No, actually I am a large mouth tenor."

'You see these things, you don't bite them, you suck them out...'

'I'm a Pisces.'

'I wonder why goldfish are gold.' - 'So they don't rust.'

'Turbidity is pretty high today, better keep the kids inside...'

'Yes we are observing the swordfish boycott, but we brought in special herring with nose jobs.'

George realized that eating up the neighbourhood had caused a certain extent of loneliness.

'Do you think he recognizes us?'

Fish don't get away with silent gas.

'I know it's tough starting out. Your father and I started out in a plastic bag.'

"You see, if we learn to swim upside down, they won't see us coming..."

"Well, I don't know I'd call you lucky, but I do agree your boyfriend is quite a catch."

"The food is so-so, but they make up for it with free refills on the drinks."

Traveller's Luggage.