Fire Prevention Gifts

Pay Now . . . or Pay Later.

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

"Smokey The Tree"

"And that's General Ambrose T. Spangler. He died in the Great Mustache Fire of 1897."

With Thorssen, it's "Pillage and blunder".

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

'We just invented cooking yesterday, and already she's serving leftovers!'

The New Normal

This "fire" invention is taking more wood than we expected. The First Cost Overrun.

'It's good to see that you have a smoke detector...'

"Who says you can't take it with you? This one has a fireproof lining."

"It would be great if you could turn the smoke machine down a little during worship..."

'I'm filling in for the sommelier. We have a fine shiraz today for only $39. It's 14.7 alcohol, a Class 1B flammable, so if I see you consume it near an open flame, I'll have to cite you.'

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

"These are the environmentalists who set the Amazon forest on fire!"

"The third leading cause of forest fires."

'I'm afraid this is going to lead to regulation of my invention.'

"You'll have to excuse my date. He spontaneously combusts from time to time."

The Cause of the Australian Bushfires

'Even down here we never lose our sense of humor!'

"Love your ambiance!"

"Let’s not speak of this, Tommy – scouts’ honor?"

'It was an exciting party, especially when the firemen came to put out the fire!'

Forest rangers prevent forest fires

"We can't wake her, she's sleepwalking."

Scarecrow jumps out of a birthday cake and then catches on fire.

'In case of fire, don't panic. Pay your bill then leave.'

'The casserole didn't make it.'

'Wow. The anti-smoking movement really has been successful.'

Santa hosing the Chimney.

Forest Management

Smokey Bear crying because of deliberately started forest fires

"Maybe this is insignificant, what with everything going on in the world, but do we have a fire extinguisher?"

"Hold on! Baxter's trying to tell us something..." "The kitchen is on fire"

The Biggest Forest Fire Starter