Finding Love Again Pillows

Senior dating disasters.

'I wouldn't kick her out of bed.'

Still searching for my Prince Charming.

Today, proud and accomplished the career woman re-enters the dating world, ready at last to meet the man of her dreams. . .

"Getting back into the market can be stressful. I recommend a portfolio of sleep-aids, tranquilizers, and antacids.'

I haven't been down there since last Valentine's day. I want to check on a couple who asked me to rekindle their romance. A year ago I told them that thanks to me they'd be spending more time together and less time at their offices. I said I'd make it so they'd have lots of nights at home ordering some take-out and watching a movie. They must be very happy with me. All I did was shoot an arrow of love, but apparently they think I caused some sort of pandemic to happen!

"And I never kiss in the first two seconds."

"Two, please—one senior and one tootsie."

'You used to make love to me like a Flying Scotsman, now you're more like a Puffing Billy!'

Biological Cuckoo clock

Ultimately love would find her...

Tasty.

'They were going to get married when they were young, but he kept forgetting the wedding date!'

Financially Secure Romantic with sufficient fire in belly seeks damsel in distress...

"Ideally, I'm looking for a guy who can make me smile."

'Wow - My kind of man.'

'Be fair, George - how do you expect me to find your contact lens in this lot?'

Single men in Tahiti

"You had me at hell."

Cupid

Jenga!!!

'Hand me the 'desperates'.'

We found each other the first time either of us tried online dating! It was love at first website!

"Don't make eye contact. Don't make eye contact. Don't...."

'Hnoey, it's ncie to hvae a rielhastiop wtih smoenoe who can atuclaly utrednsnad me.' 'I konw waht you maen.'

'The first time I met her, she practically swept me off my feet!'

Lonely Hearts Dating Agency - "Mmm he's a bit of a dish."

"AI can now scan dating sites and find your best match."

"Being a refrigerator magnet is fine, but I wish, for just one day, I could be a chick magnet."

'We met online.'

"...Also, true love is eventually tax deductible."

'I met my wife on Faeces Book.'

"Sure, I can help you improve your mating call: that's my specialty..."

"I maried an author so I guess you could say I met Mr. Write."

"Here's one - 'Few-bricks-short-of-a-load seeks One-our-out-of-the-water.'."