Financially Savvy Couch Potato Pillows

Comparison Site: Switch Energy Supplier/Ignore, Have A Cup Of Tea.

'She'll never look for me here.'

''Food miles' is a big issue, so I'm reducing the distance my food travels by moving my fridge into the living room.'

"Great idea. Movies are so much better on the big screen."

Saving for Retirement.

It's 10 P.M. does anyone know what 'sequestration' means?

Hello-BUNS OF STEEL?

"My fit watch has conspired with the TV remote. The remote only stays on some fitness channel until I get up and exercise."

Happy Brithday

Tonight, on the microwave channel... chicken pot pie!

"Business has picked up since we introduced short term cryogenic stays for the football off season."

'The Cup Final's just starting-think I should wake him?'

Advanced Zen for Couch Potatoes: Earl becomes One with his Lazy-Boy.

Easy Listening for lazy people.

'I only come to the game for the half time entertainment and snack bar privileges.'

"You were the one who said we couldn't afford a new vacuum, so stop moaning and suck harder!"

"You have to start exercising. Running your mouth, skipping breakfast, and jumping to conclusions doesn't count."

'This is my favorite machine in the gym.'

RETIREMENT VOWS

'Now I can watch what I want, there's nothing I want to watch.'

"This recliner comes with a fitness tracker."

"It's 10000 steps a DAY, not a YEAR!"

'Sorry, we couldn't pry the remote from his fingers.'

'Put it on my 'to do' list...'

"Haven't you heard? Twenty's the new ten!"

'Very good, Now ten more reps...and a one, and a two and ...'

"Let's fight obesity - left leg up..."

'Grandma said the only thing you like to draw is your pension!'

"You'd get up and take out the trash if your activity tracker told you to."

"It's about this smart T.V. that you sold me, it won't let me watch Love Island."

'You need an exercise program other than bar-hopping.'

'I've been thinking, Mother - if the whole civilised world was destroyed and we were the only ones left alive . . . there's no way I'd want to change a thing'

My dad likes watching documentaries.

"Jason's been inspired by the Olympics into watching all of the Paralympics too."

"Say, Fred – this is Wally. How about a beer?"