Financially Frazzled Pillows

'How about we don't pay these bills and hope, in the meantime, someone steals our identity.'

'It's the credit card bill.'

Sorry, for 'distressed debt' please see a financial counselor.

"Before we discuss your loan, Mr. Carlson, perhaps you'd like to spend a few moments with our bank chaplain."

'The credit card company called.'

'Don't let this market get to you, Dave. Remember, it's happening to your brother-in-law, too.'

A man flees from a bank

'Yo-you Ma will now raise our spirits and assuage our pain.'

Peter

"He doesn't fiscally stimulate me anymore."

Wanna talk about it?

"Pendleton will stay afloat no matter what!"

'No trouble at all giving you an overdraft Mr Simkins - have mine!'

'Having the money tree has really helped out.'

"Your assets will be frozen? Oh, boy, is it going to snow?"

'I have good news and bad news. The good news is that you're going to get to relive the thrill of building your company up from nothing!'

"Even after all that's happened, I feel no less regal."

'We may be bankrupt, but we're not broke.'

Easy Budget Terms Are Not That Easy.

'I was close to a breakthrough when the grant money ran out.'

"That's it - we've eaten the last of the energy bills."

'I am a staving artist. I'm fat because all I can afford is junk food!'

No Money

"I'm sorry, Ma, but we're forced to sell the art collection."

"Could be worse..." "Could be worse..." "Could be worse..." "Could be... oh, never mind."

Remember you predicted some 'difficulties' with my bank?

"Unfortunately, my holding on to tech-stocks was faith-based."

'Remember you asked me to turn around the business!'

"Remember, son, what doesn't kill you, makes you poorer."

'How can you sleep at night?'

'Business as usual, baby - Wall Street is back!'

When they said more people were choosing to holiday at home I think they meant in the UK

"Only another thousand points up and I'm even, honey."

"When we got married, you said we'd be in the lap of luxury...but here we are, in the butt of bankruptcy!"

'I need something to wear to a bankruptcy hearing.'