Financially Frazzled Gifts

'How about we don't pay these bills and hope, in the meantime, someone steals our identity.'

'It's the credit card bill.'

Sorry, for 'distressed debt' please see a financial counselor.

"Before we discuss your loan, Mr. Carlson, perhaps you'd like to spend a few moments with our bank chaplain."

'The credit card company called.'

'Don't let this market get to you, Dave. Remember, it's happening to your brother-in-law, too.'

A man flees from a bank

'Yo-you Ma will now raise our spirits and assuage our pain.'

Peter

"He doesn't fiscally stimulate me anymore."

"Pendleton will stay afloat no matter what!"

Wanna talk about it?

'No trouble at all giving you an overdraft Mr Simkins - have mine!'

'Having the money tree has really helped out.'

'I have good news and bad news. The good news is that you're going to get to relive the thrill of building your company up from nothing!'

"Your assets will be frozen? Oh, boy, is it going to snow?"

"Even after all that's happened, I feel no less regal."

'We may be bankrupt, but we're not broke.'

Easy Budget Terms Are Not That Easy.

'I was close to a breakthrough when the grant money ran out.'

'I am a staving artist. I'm fat because all I can afford is junk food!'

"That's it - we've eaten the last of the energy bills."

Remember you predicted some 'difficulties' with my bank?

"I'm sorry, Ma, but we're forced to sell the art collection."

Moving. Mortgage payments bankrupted them. I guess "housebroken" means something different in their case.

"Unfortunately, my holding on to tech-stocks was faith-based."

No Money

"Could be worse..." "Could be worse..." "Could be worse..." "Could be... oh, never mind."

'Remember you asked me to turn around the business!'

'How can you sleep at night?'

''Two roads diverged in a wood, and I -- I took the one less traveled by'...which was a helluva dumb place for me to launch a burger franchise!'

"Remember, son, what doesn't kill you, makes you poorer."

'Business as usual, baby - Wall Street is back!'

'We can't afford to be middle class anymore.'

'Hi Luv. . .I'm at the Grand national, you never really liked our house did you?'