Financially Fearful Pillows

"It makes me nervous to be social distanced from my money."

'Yo-you Ma will now raise our spirits and assuage our pain.'

'According to the budget, we'll have to count on body heat to keep the offices warm.'

Peter

'Why do I get the impression that my 401(k) isn't performing well.'

"He doesn't fiscally stimulate me anymore."

"Pendleton will stay afloat no matter what!"

"Double whammy. My weight now exceeds my credit score."

'No trouble at all giving you an overdraft Mr Simkins - have mine!'

'I think you've managed learning to cope almost too well.'

Sales

"Grandma! What big medical bills you have!"

The company's going bankrupt,you'll need to get someone in to bite my nails for me!

"With the rises in fuel, food and mortgage I'm going to have to put in some overtime."

"The economy doesn’t make me half as nervous as my kids do."

"Your assets will be frozen? Oh, boy, is it going to snow?"

"Even after all that's happened, I feel no less regal."

'Climate change seems to be a real thing... in the past, our money was sufficient till the 25th of a month. Nowadays, it's melted away on the 15th.'

In Case of Emergency - Break Glass and take a BIG SWIG!

'One question. Now that death's over and done with, do I still have to worry about taxes?'

'Sorry, I don't do bailouts.'

'Our vows didn't say anything about hedge fund mis-management!'

"That's it - we've eaten the last of the energy bills."

Energy Bills

"All I did was ask it if we'll ever collect Social Security and Medicare."

'Remember you asked me to turn around the business!'

'Lost my shirt in the market ! Kept some dignity with hat & tie.'

"I'm sorry, Ma, but we're forced to sell the art collection."

"Could be worse..." "Could be worse..." "Could be worse..." "Could be... oh, never mind."

"Armstrong, you're the cheapest cheapskate on earth." "Not yet, but a man can dream." "This toothache is killing me but I have no money and no insurance. Do you know where I can find a really cheap dentist?" "Of course. I can give you my guy's name. He works for peanuts." "I’ll get a pen." "You’ll also need a passport and lots of penicillin."

"I don't know what we'll do when our adjustable-rate mortgage resets."

In case of insolvency break glass.

"We were wondering if now would be a good time to panic."