Financial Worrywart Pillows

"Have you got anything to stop me worrying about my pharmaceutical shares?"

'At work I'm surrounded by yes-men. From you I expect the plain, unvarnished truth - if my bonus is reinstated will I live to enjoy it?'

"All we have to fear is fear itself and unmet quarterly projections."

'Oh, no! It's all in euros!'

'Why do I get the impression that my 401(k) isn't performing well.'

"Double whammy. My weight now exceeds my credit score."

I think I have a gilt complex.

"Grandma! What big medical bills you have!"

The truth about the death of the Dinosaurs.

"The economy doesn’t make me half as nervous as my kids do."

'Climate change seems to be a real thing... in the past, our money was sufficient till the 25th of a month. Nowadays, it's melted away on the 15th.'

'You don't know how lucky you are. My mortgage is worth more than my house.'

No Action Comics

'One question. Now that death's over and done with, do I still have to worry about taxes?'

The Circle.

'Have you seen the financial pages?' - 'Yes, things are going to get a lot worse before the get worse.'

"All I did was ask it if we'll ever collect Social Security and Medicare."

Energy Bills

The End of Economic Stimulus is Near!

"I don't know what we'll do when our adjustable-rate mortgage resets."

"The Bank has returned the rent cheque marked 'Insufficient funds', but it doesn't say whether that's them or us!"

'It's money in the bank. . . so it's worrisome.'

"My arthritis lets me know when it's going to rain, and my acid reflux lets me know when a stock market storm is rolling in."

"Sidney gets nervous if he's too far from his money."

Eye of needle fat cat size That'll do nicely.

"Do you have money or is it money that has you?"

Credit Crunch.

'You can't take it with you so I'm sending it on ahead.'

'Well, we've been talking about downsizing, and it looks like the bank is going to make sure we do.'

"Right. Money isn't everything - what's the other thing again?"

"I looked up my symptoms on the internet and I'm worried that I might be dead."

James never left his bed, seeing nothing but danger in the financial world.

'Man! With its ever-rising value, you have enough gold in your mouth to ensure a great retirement...of course without teeth!

Worried about the future? We have worst-case-scenario funds!

Very sad piggy bank